Last chance to say goodbye...

So... today is the last day of the year, huh!??

At last!!!!
It took awhile huh!??...
and here I thought it'll never come!!.. hahahaa..
How was the year 2008 had been for you?
good?
bad?
satisfied with the achievements?

2008 for me was like a roller-coaster ride..
fast,
high adrenaline
crazy and
scary
but, I survived!! wuhoo!!!

I wonder what 2009 will be like?
Will it be as crazy and scary?
Will I have another (or several..) breakdown?
Will I have another crazy obsession? or
Will I have peaceful and more meaningful life?
I would very much like to have a happy and meaningful life but,
don't we all? hahahhaaa....

So today is my last chance to say goodbye to all memories of 2008..
Thank you for all the lessons that I went through..
However, there will be memories and incidents that I want to forget and I will never, ever mention of these memories again. They will be lost in my heart, forever.. Its the only way for me to heal...

So, goodbye 2008...
I'll never see you again and
I have no regrets!!
Sayonara..

Mirror mirror on the Wall..

My father turns 70 today (Dec 26th)..
I can't believe it!!
I don't believe it!!

The big 7-0!!

Never in my wildest dream that I get to see my father become 70 years old!!
Never in my wildest dream that I get to see Anyone to be 70 years old and still strong!!

Maybe deep inside, when it comes to parents, we are still very much a child. We say to them that we want to grow up and expect them to treat us as equals but somehow I think, deep down inside we still want them to treat us like when we were a child. Hold us, tell us that they love us..

Yes, we do get irritated sometimes when they ask if we've eaten or when they tell us that we acted badly but honestly, even after each phone call that they make, secretly, we feel somehow proud, satisfied and loved..and not to mention a massive headache!!!

And You know why?

Purely selfish reasons actually!!
We feel loved (secretly) because our parents still loves us no matter what crap we gave them!!
I know I do!!..

For me, time stood still when it comes to my parents.
For me, my mother's age does not go beyond 50 and my father will always be 63...
I always believed that they will not age.. that they will stop growing old after that age limit. hahaa!! ridiculous, huh!??

I wonder how my father was this morning?..
Waking up very early for his morning prayers..
thanking god that he is still alive for another day..
Looking at the mirror and staring at the lines of years on his face..
So many memories..happy, sad
People he lost over the years.. so many of them..
The years that has passed by..
It must have been really sad to look over the years and losing so many loved ones...
I wonder if he has any regrets?
Is there anything that he would like to change if he were given that chance?..

Now, wouldn't that be a prefect gift for that 70 year old man, huh?..
The gift of time... to go back in time and change any part of his life...

How I wish I could give him that...
hummm

..Sayonara

p/s... merry christmas for those celebrating and a happy new year..
especially to you Annie Temple, you rock!!!...

War of the Roses

Are your neighbours nosy?
Believe me when I say that I do not want to fall into that category
but,
I think I am...(!!??!!)

Let me tell you a bit of my neighbourhood..
I live in the suburb with a healthy environment,
pleasant,
everyone smiles at each other,
children playing at the playground freely..
you cannot help but feel safe.
No doubt there are a few setbacks here & there like the time where my house got raided by thieves.. aside from that, its a beautiful place to live in..

My story is about a neighbour of mine..

One door down, is a married couple. They have a son and according to reliable sources, the son lives with the wife's parents in another state. Both husband (Joe) and wife are workaholics. They go to work very early in the morning and return home after dark. Often I think, they would have breakfast together before going off on their separate ways..I have seen this ritual ever since I moved in early this year..

They look content with this arrangement and seemed like a happy couple. Mind you, I am not a nosy neighbour is just that ever since my house was broken into a few months back, I became more aware of my surroundings and neighbours.

This past months, I have noticed that I have seen less and less of them. The wife would return home circa 8pm and Joe will follow suit but lately, they would return home very late circa 10pm-11pm. Sometimes only Joe comes home or just the wife. At first,I didn't really took notice because them being workaholics, its nothing new that they would spend the nite at the office to finish up their work.. Usually one day of the week they would be home, which is the weekends but now, there's no one home even on a Sunday.

And today, my husband pointed out an interesting observation..he says that our neighbour would return home at different times as not to meet each other.

And here I am thinking that I was nosy!!!.. I think is because he missus his smoking buddy at night!!..(Joe and my husband would accompany each other smoking cigarette outside at the porch..) That was why he noticed the change in my neighbour's schedule..

His conclusion was that, they, my neighbours are having a fight.. Maybe one was cheating and the other found out of the affair..
I think, because the affair was out in the open, bitter & angry words were exchanged and one left home.. They couldn't get a divorce (yet) because they may still have feelings for each other and furthermore, they have a child who is living far away to think off...

I missed my neighbour.. she's my only "friend" here...

Moral of the story..If you want to have an affair, try not to get caught!! It would be so messy later on!!...

How are you, my husband?

My life, at the moment is not perfect but,
its not bad either.
Yes, 2008 is or has been a difficult year not just for me,
but also for my other half..
What with him between jobs and me,
being an unhealthy person for most part of the year, must have been quite difficult for him.

I never actually asked him, how he coped through out the year.. does that make me a bad person? Hell!! I even tried to bailed on his birthday!!

I think that qualifies me as a Certified Bad Person!!

Why am I mean to him? I do feel sometimes that I am a little hard on him.. not always, just on occasion.. I tend to be a little heartless, some may say a little inconsiderate.. People say to me that I married a man who loves and excepts me for who I am even with all my flaws and I am one of the luckiest women on earth....

There are so many dotted lines that needs to be filled out and I find that I am running out of answers...
I do not have much time left, the year is almost coming to the end and I need to find some kind of closure before I can proceed to the next year...

What should I do?...

The first move, why me?

Last night I found a long lost friend online.
I was surprised to hear from him.

We use to be close but, ahh!!..that was ancient history!!
But still, I was surprised that he was still awake at that time...

Which brings me to this question,
have you ever thought that in other part of the world, someone you know is also thinking of you as you are thinking of that person?

The irony of this is, why isnt that person take the first move?
Why does it always, almost everytime it has to be you that makes that first move?
It is tiring, isn't it?

When I was younger, in search of true love, I always envisioned (and pray!!..) that the right guy will come and make the first move and sweep me off to a far away place....

I was young and naive!!
It will never happen in real life, well in my life anyway!!
So in the end, it was me who made that first move...
But you know, no matter how hard you tried, you will somehow, lose that person.
The person that you tried so hard getting by making the right moves, saying the right things...

ahh.. that is life!! cruel!! but you have to live it you can't run away...

Is that time of the year again where I become melancholic, forgive me...

bummer!!

My latest Obsession

hehee!!!....
so, I am still not done yet with my sudden interest in Korean drama...
and he is the reason of this crazy obsession...



Bae Yong Jun, everyone!! remember that name!!!...

and the best part is, we are of the same age!!
yes!!!

Korean drama, anyone?

Can I interest you with a Korean drama?
For some of you, especially those in Asia,
you'll definitely know the actor.

Even if you have not seen his ever famous drama,
Winter Sonata
you know him!!!

Yes, he is Bae Yong Joon!!! remember that name!!

The drama is called The Legend and it comes in a 2-box set.

I am so, definitely hooked!!!
Now I understand why my elder sister is his ultimate biggest fan!!

Go and watch this drama...
Some way you will get hooked!!
Believe me!!
Trust me when I say, resistance is definitely futile!!!

Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go and watch episode 26 (onwards..hehehhee!!), again!!!

Sayonara!!!