It’s Friday, 31st August 2007
MERDEKA MERDEKA MERDEKA

Today we celebrate our Independence Day!!!; taken from the movie Independence Day.

What does Independence Day mean to you?... Our forefathers, they understood the true meaning & the struggle for our Independence. They suffered a lot. Honestly, we would never really understand the pain that they had gone through. I’m being very patriotic today, sorry… but please bare with me.. for a few more minutes….

So, what does Independence Day mean to you?
I had this question ringing in my head the whole day today, scary actually!!. Today I started the day with watching the parade on the telly. It used to be fun watching the parade. but not anymore. Maybe it’s because I did not watch the parade with the old man aka my father… It was fun watching with him. When I was younger, I would wake up early just to watch it with him. I love the way he comments the costume, uniform that those people wore during the parade. He had such colorful comments!!! He would tell us stories of the moment when he had to hide from the bad people… I missed those moments. As I always say, Nothing is Too Trivial…

Many of us can never really answer this question. I don’t blame you. So, let us
re-construct the question..shall we?

What does FREEDOM mean to you?
What’s it worth?
What would you do to get your Freedom?
What would you sacrifice to preserve the Freedom that you have fought so hard so that your children, and your childrens’ children would not suffer like you did?

There is this article I read about William Wallace, yes, the guy from Braveheart, Mel Gibson..
Following the trial, on 23 August 1305, Wallace was taken from the hall, stripped naked and dragged through the city at the heels of a horse to Smooth Field. He was drawn, hanged and quartered — strangled by hanging but released while still alive, emasculated, eviscerated and his bowels burnt before him, beheaded, then cut into four parts — at the Elms in Smithfield. His preserved head was placed on a pike atop London Bridge. It was later joined by the heads of his brother, John, and Simon Fraser. His limbs were displayed, separately, in Newcastle, Berwick, Stirling, and Aberdeen.

I don’t think I’m strong enough.. must be scary for him. He must have suffered, BIG TIME!!!
But think.. he stood his ground.. Protecting his belief, preserving it at whatever cause.. Could we be like him?
Could I be like him? Protecting my belief at whatever cause? Just think, what would become of us if we give up whatever little hope we have for that one instance?
We would not be here…

NOTHING IS TOO TRIVIAL

TO FREEDOM…

Video (?)

..I'm trying out this new feature. Can u open the file?
If you can, do you hear the background music? it's Enrique's
new song....

Big girls Don't Cry

Ahh Friday... i love Fridays.. don't you?
before that, have you heard this song,
Big girls Don't Cry, by Fergie?
It's a beautiful and sad song...

So, back to Fridays...
at the end of the day, I get really tired up to a point of
exhaustion...(did i spell it right?)
maybe because the week is slowly coming to an end (?) or
maybe because I've been working really hard during the day? ...
somehow, that sounds funny!!!!

But seriously, it has been a long week for me..
a lot has happened, good and bad.
I have made some Wise decisions and some NOT so wise.
its a risk you have to make, right? this DECISION MAKING thingy.. (?)
People may not agree with the decisions that you make but, they have to accept it.
Some will try to persuade you to change the decision to their benefit and some...
some will just keep quite and nod to you as if trying to say that they understand why you made such decision... am i making any sense? I'm talking in circle, huh?
Its because it has been a really tough week for me...

News flash!! ...
I will be 35 years old this coming September, and I think I need to do a medical check-up... aarrgghh!!!.. that is scary!!! I just found out that a clan member was just diagnosed with High Cholesterol,and she is only 40...

What about me?

I'm sure the doctors will have a field day!!! They will find all sorts of sickness on me...from my bones and all the way down to my DNA and blood structures!!!!

yes!! I'm afraid of hospitals!!

I'm not afraid of needles and blood, hell! I gave birth the traditional way!!
..its the smell, the hospital smell, you know, THE SMELL.. the medicine, the disinfectant solutions..

And the NURSES... Especially the nurses..the women in white, they scare me!!!
If they smile at you, that means, they have the answers as to why you are there.. now, doesn't that scare you??!!!! aarrggghhh!!!!!

Tomorrow there will be a gathering of the clan...
Should I make myself available?
They DEFINITELY will want my explanation on the decision that I made...

What should I do? What should I do?

I am Proud to be MALAYSIAN

I have an interesting story to tell you.

It happened yesterday at a restaurant.
It was in the afternoon, I went to buy lunch for the family..(I can’t be bothered to cook… *smile*) anyway, while I was looking thru the variety of food and choices that I had to make, there’s this beautiful Chinese lady (I think she’s my age. bummer..) she started a conversation with me..(must be because of my child smiling at her.. I think)

Hai!! You selalu beli lauk sini ke?

Ada jugak..

Berapa umur anak you?

Baru 2 setengah..*senyum sopan*

Clever girl..

You pernah try rendang ayam dia? *sambil menceduk beberapa ketul ayam*

At this time, she was practically drooling at the food… hahaa!!!!..
Mind you, the food do look tasty, with all the spices…lovely!!..

This is the best rendang ayam I’ve ever had!!

Nampak pun sedap (I answered)

Semua lauk kedai ni, I suka!! Kalau datang lagi awal, lagi banyak choices kita.

Anyway, its not that expensive..

She reminds me off a Nyonya Melaka.. they love spicy foods…
don’t you just love them?
Especially the older generation of Baba Nyonya.. they can really swear!!!

I miss Melaka!!!
I studied there for 3 and a half years.
It was the best years of my life!!!

This particular incident reminds me of a friend, also a Chinese, from Penang.
He eats everything!! Especially spicy foods!
His favourite, curry!! Fish curry!!
Mind you, Malaysian curry is not the same as the curry you find in other places…
Malaysian curry has the aroma off all the authentic spices…aahh!!! Lovely!!!
It is really spicy!!!

I am proud to be a MALAYSIAN…… we share everything!!! food, movies everything…

p/s note to fellow Malaysian;

Sivaji, the Boss, amacam? berani?

Do you know what it feels like....?

do you know what its feels like
loving someone that's in a rush
to throw you away?..

do you know what its feels like
to be the last one to know the lock
on the door has changed?..


don't you just love Enrique Iglesias?? yummyy.....

www.enriqueiglesias.com

I was away recently, for a short holiday (sort of). It was pleasant… actually it was mentally exhausting. I am mentally exhausted with my surroundings.. I know the world doesn’t revolve around me but… it would be fun if it does, even if it is only for one day, don’t you think??

First story…

Last Sunday, a clan member had a “goodbye” reception for their condo. They are renting it out and the new tenants are settling in on Monday. I was told that the place was a beauty!. It had a swimming pool, the condo was really big, it was more like a “holiday” condo rather than a “living” condo. I wasn’t around to attend the reception; I received a phone call from one of the clan member telling me how unfortunate I was for not attending… My mother taught us to be supportive to one another but, there are things and times when I just wish that they would leave me alone… Yes, I do feel inferior whenever I’m around them. You know why, because we don’t make as much money per year as them!!! Of course they will say, its not about the money & they want to share their happiness with everyone but at the end of the day, it is always about the money… ALWAYS!!!

Second story…

Where should I start??....hmmm…????....

My baby was ill, very ill, for weeks. We when to 3 different doctors but she’s still ill. Not only that, she throws tantrums now!! I know they say when the child reaches 2 years old; they will develop a condition known as Terrible Two.. but this has gone too far!!!.. Now, whenever my husband gets angry of her, he blames it on me… me!!!... Every little thing he blames it on me…

Is it my fault if she doesn’t want to eat?

Is it my fault if for no apparent reason, she cries?

Is it my fault if she doesn’t want to take her medications?

Is it my fault if I can’t understand what she wants?

I am human too…

I am mentally exhausted… I’m so tired of all this!! I wish I can make it all go away and I could be that happy person I was before…There are times that I wish that I could go away and leave everything behind….