Day 365 of 365

🖐💬

Hey.... Its me again... If feels like if you were alive, you'd hate me!! 🤪 Let's be honest here.. I have not been online often for you.  The last time I was here was in July 2019. If you were a guy, I would make a very bad girlfriend!!!! 

So, on to what has been happening to me in the last 5mths... 

Let's see 🤔🤔🤔🤔 

LIFE 

Thats what happened.. It hit hard on me & my family. I try to shield all the hardship from my girls & family. Only me & my husband are aware.. He quit his job sometime in June 2019 & till now, he still hasn't secured any other job. He did got hold of one job in August/September but that was it. Nothing came after that. I can't blame him for quitting his last job because in reality, I don't know what actually transpired between him & his employee. I can only imagine.. 🙄🙄 I had used up all my savings/ resources for the coming monthly bills and rentals. 

I feel bad for my girls. During the school holidays which was about 1 1/2mths, We can't take them for a vacation. Our car is constantly asking for some form of repair be it change of tyres, battery, sparkplug.. you name it. Usually during these holiday season, we would go back to visit my in-laws, but now we can't go back. I pity my husband though, he hasn't seen his family in 5mths. I must confess. I feel bad 🙄🤪 Recently I received some cash ($$) from my mother, with this amount, we could use it for a short trip back to his hometown but I didn't tell him. Because I needed this money ($) to pay rentals & bills for the coming months... I feel like a Bad person 💀☠ 

For the last 5mths, I have been suffering some form of anxiety due to this fold of events. 🙄🤨😶😑😶 

And I haven't even started on my girls. I have a 14y/o and a 13y/o. Oh boy 🤨🤪🤨 they are difficult. Raising teenagers are hard!!! Boy problem, Bullying problem. I felt like screaming!!! 😵😵😵 But I kept praying and ask Allah to make me stronger, to make my girls stronger to face these challenges... 

Life is stressful for me. I had to turn to my Happy Place. You already know what that is, right? My Bujo. I have been faithful to it till the very end. Along the way, I have collected loads of bujos materials like washi tapes, stickers, stamps...   

For 2020, I shall continue using Bujo. At least it gives some color to my life. 

That's all my rambling for 2019. I shall continue in 2020 🎉🎈✨🎋🎏🎀

💋❤